I had to take a little time off from touring to go back to work to make some money. My wallet was dry. Plus, I don't care much for state fairs, which is what Clay's been playing this past week.

When I got to work my first day back, my manager at McDonald's told me I had been fired. Not because I showed up 3 hours late today, not because I flashed a customer upon my arrival, and not because I spoke loudly of the position in which Clay and I would be in during the conception of our first child, but because I hadn't been to work in over a month. Apparently, it's against company policy to take impromptu-unapproved vacation time.

I tried to explain the situation of following Clay and everyone laughed at me. But I showed them. I called Seacrest and sweet-talked him over the phone. I convinced him to convince McDonald's to give me my job back. And he did. Now I owe him. I hope he doesn't call in that favor anytime soon. I think my phone call should hold him off for a while, with all the grunting and groaning he was making. I don't wanna know what was happening over there.

I got into town this morning with my freshly cashed paycheck. I checked into the hotel Clay was staying at. I found out this info courtesy of a tapped Locke line.

They put me in a room on the 12th floor next to a vending machine. They must have known of my love of Coke. I had no idea what room Clayton was staying in, but I vowed to find out before dinnertime. After I checked in I dressed in a bellboy uniform that I had found under the bathroom sink and went in search of Clay.

I walked down the hall like I had business there. I put my ear to every door and listened. When I didn't hear any snarking, giggling, crying, or beautiful noises coming from inside, then I moved on to the next one.

He wasn't on my floor, so I headed to the elevators. When I got on, I proceeded to push a button, but there were 57 floors to choose from. Good Lord, where will I start? I thought to myself.

Before I could make a decision, the door opened and John Dahlstrom stepped on. I held my breath and pretended I didn't know who he was. "Nice weather we're having."

He looked at me oddly. "There's a tornado watch in effect."

"Oh."

I noticed he had a single red rose in his hand. I pointed at it. "For your girlfriend?"

"I'm gay." He said as if I should have known... which I did. I just forgot. But he didn't know that.

"I know. I mean, I don't know! Cause I don't know who you are, John. GASP!!! I mean... that was just a lucky guess. You're name probably isn't even John. And you're certainly not Clay's hairdresser."

I was having diarrhea of the mouth. I tried to play dumb. "Uh... Clay? Clay who? I don't know why I said Clay. I don't know any Clay." Ugh! That didn't fix things.

He stood there dumbfounded. I stumbled over Clay's name a few more times. Then I let out a scream and pushed the 'door open' button. The doors opened and I ran out. John stared me down as the doors shut. I screamed again.

I hyperventilated in the hall as I watched to see what floor the elevator stopped on. 21. I waited a few minutes to collect myself and to give John time to get back to his room. Then I got back on the elevator. My shaky hand pushed the button for the 21st floor.

When it opened Jerome, Clay's big, burly, black body guard was standing in front of the doorway. I later found out it was Clay's bodyguard Jerome. I tried to get off the elevator but he stepped in front of me and crossed his arms across his chest. "Can I help you?"

"Uh... I work here."

"No one's allowed on the floor."

"But I work here. See?" I pointed to my uniform. He did not look impressed. "I wasn't notified that any employees would be coming up to the floor."

"Um... Mr. Aiken called down and requested a personal massage."

He glared down at me and it flustered me.

"I like Clay."

Why did I say that?!

He didn't say a word. He just motioned for me to get back on the elevator. I obeyed.

Having no other entrances to the floor, I went back to my room to regroup.

I was lying on my bed plotting my next move when the open window caught my attention. I stuck my head out and examined the ledge. It was about two feet wide. More than enough room for me to walk on. I climbed out the window and stood on the ledge. There were bricks sticking out every few feet the entire way up the wall. It was perfect for me to climb my way up to Clay's floor, which I did like a champ.

When I got up to his floor, I leaned back against the wall and peaked into a window. It was empty. I inched my way down the ledge, doing the same thing to the next two windows. Both were empty. When I got to the net one, I forgot to be cautious and I stuck my face right on the window. In the room was Jerome. I jumped to the other side of the window. I wasn't sure if I was quick enough, so I held my breath and waited quietly for him to open the window and toss me off the ledge. He didn't.

I made my way down to the next window. I heard the sound of running water and Clayton singing. I had to prepare myself for the beautiful sight of Clay in the shower before I looked in the window. I closed my eyes tight. Before I could open them, a pair of strong hands grabbed me around the neck and pulled me inside the window. It was Jerome. He carried me out of the room, down the hallway, onto the elevator, down to the main floor, and out to the front sidewalk. He dropped me to the ground and walked back inside. He stopped in the doorway and turned to give me a look that said I better get to steppin'. Then he went in. He never said a word.

So much for that idea.